Happy New Year friends!
Dear Sweet Wonderful Hubby and I were treated by VERY generous family members and friends to an over-the-top extravagant Christmas-New Years celebration. Wow. "Car service" (read "limo") at our disposal to drive us around a city we had never before visited. Keys to the Mercedes for whenever we wanted the driver to "bring the car around" so we could explore on our own. Decadent meals in fine restaurants, no reservations... holiday crowds... no problem, friends' connections got us right to the front of every line. And best of all quality time with people we love... Who love us back. I'm still pinching myself... Back home, it all feels like a dream... the likes of which I'd NEVER aspired, but could very easily imagine myself getting used to.
Powerball fantasy has me dreaming of permanence of that amazing "lifestyle." One of my BFFs was asking if we were in it to win it. Together we shared fantasies of what instant wealth might provide. In my heart I remember and "amen"...
Proverbs 30:8-9
Keep falsehood and lies far from me; give me neither poverty nor riches, but give me only daily bread. Otherwise I may have too much and disown You and say "Who is The Lord?" Or I may become poor and steal and so dishonor the name of my God.
Once home from our awesome trip I got a call from one of my dearest high school bffs. We seldom get to talk 'cause she's in that SUPER busy stage of life with small children.
Together in HS she and I studied early childhood development together and were each assigned a twin to observe and write our reports about. Back then we bet each other we'd have twins first. We now joke that the race extends to the next generation. Haha.
She was birthing her kids about the time we were adopting. Fast forward a couple years and she's an adoptive mom too. When you love kids, I suppose it predisposes you to adopt kids who need loving homes.
She ended up adopting a sibling group too. Interesting story how she got them. But it's her story to tell if/when she needs to.
She was expressing feelings of a lack of love toward the one with attachment disorder. I told her to hold on. I reminded her she does indeed love her daughter she's patient, kind keeping on, still trying still hoping still protecting... Etc...
Dear Sweet Wonderful Hubby and I were treated by VERY generous family members and friends to an over-the-top extravagant Christmas-New Years celebration. Wow. "Car service" (read "limo") at our disposal to drive us around a city we had never before visited. Keys to the Mercedes for whenever we wanted the driver to "bring the car around" so we could explore on our own. Decadent meals in fine restaurants, no reservations... holiday crowds... no problem, friends' connections got us right to the front of every line. And best of all quality time with people we love... Who love us back. I'm still pinching myself... Back home, it all feels like a dream... the likes of which I'd NEVER aspired, but could very easily imagine myself getting used to.
Powerball fantasy has me dreaming of permanence of that amazing "lifestyle." One of my BFFs was asking if we were in it to win it. Together we shared fantasies of what instant wealth might provide. In my heart I remember and "amen"...
Proverbs 30:8-9
Keep falsehood and lies far from me; give me neither poverty nor riches, but give me only daily bread. Otherwise I may have too much and disown You and say "Who is The Lord?" Or I may become poor and steal and so dishonor the name of my God.
Once home from our awesome trip I got a call from one of my dearest high school bffs. We seldom get to talk 'cause she's in that SUPER busy stage of life with small children.
Together in HS she and I studied early childhood development together and were each assigned a twin to observe and write our reports about. Back then we bet each other we'd have twins first. We now joke that the race extends to the next generation. Haha.
She was birthing her kids about the time we were adopting. Fast forward a couple years and she's an adoptive mom too. When you love kids, I suppose it predisposes you to adopt kids who need loving homes.
She ended up adopting a sibling group too. Interesting story how she got them. But it's her story to tell if/when she needs to.
She was expressing feelings of a lack of love toward the one with attachment disorder. I told her to hold on. I reminded her she does indeed love her daughter she's patient, kind keeping on, still trying still hoping still protecting... Etc...
From 1Corinthians 13...
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.
I explained what is frequently missing in relationships with attachment disordered kids is the warm fuzzy feelings that accompany "reciprocated love."
I encouraged her to keep on keeping on despite a lack of reciprocation my friend is making a positive difference despite the child's inability to "appreciate" all the hard work that goes into loving a child adopted from life's hard places. She doesn't have it in her account to give back. Something broke big in our attachment disordered kids long before we ever met them. It's not their fault, it's not ours either.
Keep on loving...
Love doesn't mean we have to fake warm fuzzies that don't exist. When children we love hurt and hate us on a regular basis the feelings of warm-fuzzies aren't there.
